Confused of Oxford writes…

I have just bewildered myself in a similar way to the following:

1. Stand on Walton Street at the crossroads with Cranham Street, outside the Jericho Cafe.
2. Turn to face down Walton Street towards the Phoenix Picturehouse, and stare at it for a moment. While you’re doing this, think to yourself “films, cinema, films, cinema”.
3. Then quickly look to your right, at the side of the Jericho Health Centre, in particular at the sign saying “chlamydia screening”.
4. Be afraid and confused.