For rousing in oneself a feeling of raw power and primeval energy, I have discovered there’s nothing quite like biting the head off an animal and devouring the whole thing in one sitting. Even if it is a chocolate reindeer.
As news of this feat spreads, I imagine I will be all the more feared and respected.
I fear and respect you, timmeh.
I am glad to hear this.
I was thinking I may have had to follow up with the tale of how I startled a pheasant with the dregs from a coffee pot, but I think that’s no longer necessary.
You startled a pheasant? Tell us more you crazy powerful little monkey man!
Well, there’s quite a story behind that. I opened the back door to fling used coffee grounds onto the garden, and I noticed that my opening the door had caused a pheasant that was in the garden to look a bit surprised and waddle off.
Although I have now done better even than that: I startled a dinosaur last night. Really quite a big one. It was making me a bit nervous as it was sniffing around the bushes where I was hiding. I suspect it was herbivorous, but I wasn’t going to take any chances. So by giving a terrible yell, I alarmed it so much that it fell over backwards in a slightly comedic fashion. I do wonder if I may have just dreamt it.